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Tara Bradford Photography

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« Two weeks on the South Coast | Main | The Bani Hamida Women's Weaving Project »

20 January 2010

Comments

julochka

very good thoughts. but why is it so hard to let go of the things? i've been thinking about that a lot lately and i don't have any answers.

and i've come home with a new suitcase from many a trip as well. only they're stashed in the attic, as we don't have a cellar. :-)

i hope the antiques dealers were kind!

le petit cabinet de curiosites

Tara, did you sell well ?
I love the way you explain it , you are gypsy princess

Catherine

Nearly thirty years ago some friends moved to the UK for two years and lent us some of their furniture. They're still there! When we moved from the North Island of NZ to the south, we passed it on to other mutual friends, so it would still be in the same city when our friends came back for it. Guess it's unlikely that they will, now :)

I understand your grief, but imagine the pleasure that you get from searching for new items goes some way to compensate

sherri

I wish I lived near you I'd love to look through your finds. I understand your gypsy lifestyle... I did it for years, rented a storage unit and kept my car at an aunts house. Everyone was always asking her if the car was for sale. :) I've been in the same place for a while and miss the roaming lifestyle but also enjoy being settled.

leoniewise

i don't have the horror stories to share that you do Tara, of things being trusted to another's care only to find that care wasn't taken. i can definitely relate to some of your words though... half of me wanting to be ready to pick up and leave with just a couple of bags and the clothes on my back, the other half wanting to be settled somewhere that i can hang all my art on the walls, collect furniture that i love & treasure, make a home for us. we live in a furnished flat and it really doesn't feel like home at all. i hope you had a successful day with the dealers and that you are feeling okay about it all.

i am thinking of you
xxx

kathryn

I agree with Stacy in everything she has said. You have all my best wishes for your future Tara. Ive bn through the same ordeal with so called friends as you. Concentrate on looking after yourself, and rely on no one. I know it hurts so very much having to part with your treasures, but, you will come through this .You might not think so at the moment, but trust me you will. Remember, LOOK AFTER YOURSELF. No one else will. You HAVE to harden your heart more, or you will get hurt. You are a wonderful girl and better than the so called friends who have walked all over you. Take care of yourself Tara, and try to be strong.Know thats easier said than done, but ive done it, so know you can and will. love kathryn in ilkeston, derbyshire, u.k. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

jeanie

What a thoughtful and provocative post. I, too, suffer from the collecting gene -- All the Jeans in our family have it! Or had it! I'm blessed with a rather large basement all for storage. Still... if it doesn't get used. But we purchase things with such great expectations, don't we (says the woman who bought several prints at Vanves and now is needing some framing time! And more walls!).

Having seen your space, I can tell where you are coming from and most certainly understand. But I also understand the wee wrench in the gut knowing that soon you'll be parting with these lovely things. However, my dear, knowing you, more lovely things are to come. Chin up! I know you won't let the dealers take you for a ride!

Cheryl

Forty suitcases! And your 'friends' who took your things, esp. the paintings, what a horrible experience! I've given paintings to my sister under the understanding that she'd pay for them in due time (always soon, she tells me). But at least I know I can always take them back (which I probably never will). Did they tell you who they sold the paintings to? You might be able to get them back if you explained the circumstances under which they were sold.

I can relate as well to the need to nest and the need for freedom and novelty. I tend not to buy certain things because of these conflicting desires. But at least the things you're letting go of will find new homes. Here in the US a lot of us just rent a storage unit, which always strikes me as a waste.

Good luck, hope you get a great deal!

Di Overton

I'm not sure what to say here other than - you are THE most generous person I have ever come across and believe me when I say that all your gifts are treasures to me.
Hugs
Di
xo

Colette

I know what you mean, I really do, having lived out of suitcases, moved around the world, and had negligent "friends."
Big huge hugs to you. xoxo

RD

I know it's hard to find the right balance. I feel rooted when surrounded by beautiful things I love, though I by no means am a collector of things. I have a single silk gerbera daisy in a small ceramic pot that has sat in the various bathrooms I've lived in for years. I can't seem to get rid of it--it gives me a sense of home. When you're a citizen of the world, it's nearly impossible to grow roots in one place.

christina

i feel your words, deep inside my heart. i fill with tears, because i yearn for a place, where it feels like home.
xoxo

Gillian

It must be difficult for you to trust now, after having such horrific experiences with your so-called "friends." Oh my heart goes out to you, not even for the loss but for the sheer betrayal. That in itself is worse than losing your objects.

I try to not "attach" to things or people. But in life, sometimes it happens so any deception big or small ends up hurting very bad. Maybe we seek possessions in order to define ourselves, and when we shed our skin, or grow, or learn we purge...and begin anew. Seeking out new things to replace the old things we once cherished. I think the external deeply reflects the internal.

Please believe in safety, it does exist. Believing in things makes them so, including believing people will steal from you or hurt you. We draw the things in sometimes that we fear the most.

As for the antiques dealers...I hope the cheques they cut you are huge and you reap some benefit from your past experiences. Be ruthless yet kind in your dealings, settling only for what is fair or good for you! Give nothing away Tara. Know your value.

As for moi, I value you~! So!!! Can't wait until a few measly weeks from now. Petra, here we come.

xoxox
(Can't wait to see you!)

Vicki in Michigan

Agreeing with every word Stacy said.

I find it easy to decide I need to have less stuff -- and very hard to decide what should go..............

Sending sympathy as you go through this hard process.

Stacy Hurt

I must say that the accounts of so called 'friends' who vanish & take your things with them left my jaw on the desk! How positively horrid! I'm sure there is a special circle of hell reserved for such charlatans! I feel sad that you have to get rid of your treasures but am excited for you at the prospect of your move & subsequent new adventures ahead! Bon Voyage!

Helen

Purging is good for the soul...and the home place. Best of luck during the business part of things. I know you will keep the things that are important to you in your heart and head always.

Marilyn

It is a struggle, isn't it? Holding onto things. I sometimes thing I could lose everything and start fresh with only my camera and computer too. Last year I grieved not having grandchildren, but have learned to give away those things I thought I would pass on to them. Last week I gave a beautiful antique mug to a new baby, her family will enjoy it. So gradually I let go of a dream, but in it's place create new dreams. Good luck with moving forward.

doorways traveler

beautifully written, tara. i totally relate to that balance of nest and wings, settled and uprooted.

loved it.

lisa

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